Daily Meditations

The Desert and Temptation (Part III)

Temptations, the monks tell us, make us human. They bring us in to contact with the roots that bear the trunk. Facing temptations means encountering the truth. Thus one father says: “Take away temptations, and no one will be whole, for whoever flees useful temptation, flees eternal life. There are in fact temptations that have prepared crowns for the saints.”

Many people might have problems with this, because when they pray the Our Father, they ask God, “Lead us not into temptation.” But here Jesus is talking about a different kind of temptation, the temptation to fall away altogether. Let us not fall into the situation of breaking away. Thus Jesus teaches his disciples to pray, while he himself prays for them on that account (see Luke 22:31-32; John 17:14-15). On the contrary, by temptations the monks mean thoughts in our mind, passions, and demons. These temptations are an essential part of us. They test us, try us, and leave us the better for it. But this also means that we can’t come to God with a clean slate. Our task is rather to take part in the fight with the demons and to be wounded over and over again by it.

The monks don’t insist that we be perfect and flawless, correct and without stain. Those who get to know the demons in temptation will encounter the truth of their souls. They will discover in themselves the abyss of the unconscious: murderous thoughts, sadistic imaginings, immoral fantasies. We become mature persons only when we confront these truths, when we prove ourselves in temptation.

Thus one father says: “When we pray to the Lord: Lead us not into temptation! (Matt. 6:13), we are not asking not to be tempted, because that would be impossible. We are asking only that we be not swallowed up in temptation and do something that displeases God. That is what not falling into temptation means.”

Temptation brings us closer to God. That is how Isaac of Nineveh saw it: “Without temptation there is no way of perceiving God’s care for us, there is no gaining trust in him, or learning the wisdom of the spirit, or solidifying the love of God in the soul. Before temptations you pray to God as if you were a stranger. After you have withstood the temptation out of love for him, without letting yourself be led astray by them, God looks upon you as one who has lent to him and who is entitled to the interest, and as a friend who has fought for his will against the power of the enemies.” His words show that the monks had no anxiety about temptation or about sin. The monks who fall into temptation become familiar with God in a new way. At the same time in temptation they sense the nearness of God more deeply than usual.

Temptation keeps the monks awake and makes them continue growing within. Thus John Kolobos even begs for temptation so as to make progress on his way to God. Father Poimen used to say about Father John Kolobos: “He called upon God, and his passions were taken from him, and he had no cares. He went away and said to an old man: ‘I notice that I am in peace and no longer have any temptations.’ The old man said to him: ‘Go and call upon God that an enemy may rise up against you, so that the old contrition and humility you used to have may return again! For it is precisely through temptation that the soul makes progress.’ So he asked, and when the enemy came, he no longer prayed to be liberated from him. Instead he would say: ‘Give me patience, Lord, in my struggles!’ “

~Anselm Gruen, Heaven Begins Within You: Wisdom from the Desert Fathers